h.b.irwin

caught up in the air : 5.14-5.21

In Uncategorized on May 21, 2011 at 2:55 pm

5.14

driving past the Cumberland gap

that is where I left

just settled myself and looked out

at all your unsettle every mountain

dissolving at the center

with you followers charging to the top

and some of the small ones aren’t even

trying to fuck everyone else over

honest to you you windbag so I left

on the 21st, the holiday I turned

on the cruise control because we

will never see the mountain top sinners

I roll down my window and

see your unsettle so I make

like I‘m tossing a cigarette but

I get one gangly over the door and I’m

going for it hear horns blow like trumpets

hailing from a windbag and

now I’m outside the car that has

been dissolving from the inside out

while I’ve been listening to teddy tell me that

you will never go away and

I will never escape from you

who are always and only a ghost

despite your text so just let me

ride shot gun during that split hair moment

of terror I’ll divide the goats

from the sheep the ghosts

from the sheets with my 70

mph sword of narrow perspective the clearing

is just ahead I know

because we are happening at the same time

5.16

sperm whale apolcolypse

they could fly and breathe fire

I’m pretty sure but you can

never be sure in a dream

boy told me,

“you’re subconscious is always dreaming,

isn’t that cool?”

no it isn’t you fucking fire-breathing

lizard anti-christ that means

the rapture is happening right now

over and over every second is the

end of a small world the departure

of a dead little Christian inside me

and that very real sense of doom I felt in my child’s waking life

when I heard a loud noise sound outside my window

that trumpet is always sounding I’m always being

separated from the inside out

that even though we are chaos there

is a false but constant order inside me and

I’m always last always in charge and always last

and I’m no jesus so last means last

and I’m not coming back for me if

any thing I’ve been trying to lose

my soul even when I was jesus see

that’s what sainthood is all about finding

the fire-breathing sperm whale inside you

and tearing at your skin-bits until all that’s

left is the dream so if I could please get swallowed and

leave nothing but my myths behind that would

be great, thanks.

5.20

nothing to cling to in hell so

roll through the want

over if you want it

want to dream open a net

that nets around your ankle

you think it’ll slip off for the angle

but your instinct is a dead slap some days

it wraps and jerks you up

which is surprising & stimulating & salvation

but mostly the most terrifying feeling of

all new body like puberty but it’s 2011 instead

of 2002 like they all promised make me

up pretty daddy like an angel

blow me up into the sky without warning

just like a little angel daddy

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